Reactivity Mistakes You’re Still Making

Are You Accidentally Making Your Dog's Reactivity Worse?Ever tried to soothe your dog during a stressful situation only to have them freak out even more? You're not alone—and you might be doing everything with love... but not necessarily with clarity.
Whether you’re raising your dream therapy dog or just want a well-behaved companion to share your active, family-friendly life, understanding what not to do can be just as important as knowing what to do.
Let’s talk about 5 surprisingly common mistakes that dog owners make—ones that can actually worsen reactivity and anxiety.
1. Picking Them Up = Height Advantage & Mixed Signals: It feels so natural—your dog is scared, so you scoop them up like a baby. But here’s the bigger problem: picking up your dog gives them an elevated height advantage, especially in the presence of other dogs. In canine communication, elevation can signal dominance or status—and holding your dog above another can actually trigger a confrontation.
Plus, trying to soothe with affection in the middle of a reactive episode can be a double-edged sword. You may be unintentionally giving a positive association (affection) to a negative behavior (reactivity). The result? Confusion, reinforcement of bad habits, and possibly even a dog fight.
Now, if your dog is in imminent danger—yes, absolutely pick them up! But if you’re trying to calm them with cuddles in a reactive moment, it’s time to rethink your strategy.
✨ Think of it like this: If your best friend panicked every time you got nervous, would that help you feel braver—or make you more anxious?

2. Saying “It’s Okay”... When It’s Not: We all do it. The UPS truck pulls up. Your dog tenses. You say “It’s okay!” in your softest voice. Unfortunately, those words often become a cue that something not okay is about to happen.
In dog language, that soft, reassuring tone can actually mark the moment. Your pup learns: “When I hear ‘It’s okay,’ it means something scary is coming, so I better brace myself... or bark louder.”
Try silence, or redirect with a confident voice instead: “Let’s go!” or “This way!” are much more productive.

3. Skipping Socialization or Doing It Wrong: We talk a lot about socialization in our program—because it's the foundation of emotional health. A dog who wasn’t exposed to a variety of sights, sounds, people, and animals before 16 weeks of age will always struggle more than one who was.
Even more critical? Controlled exposure. Tossing a puppy into a crowded dog park = trauma, not socialization. Letting them observe safely, build confidence, and experience neutral calmness is how true socialization works.

4. Ignoring Signals = Breaking Trust: Dogs are constantly talking—but if we don’t understand their language, we miss their pleas for help. Lip licking, yawning, turning away, stiff posture—these are all whispers before the bark.
If we ignore those early signals and leave them exposed—say, forcing a nervous pup to interact with a stranger—they learn that we won’t protect them. Their only option left? Bark, lunge, or growl. And the cycle begins.
We teach our clients to be their dog’s trusted advocate, not just their best friend.

5. Pulling Back on the Leash = Triggering a Fight Response: Ever yank back when your dog starts to pull forward? It’s a totally human reaction—but unfortunately, dogs have something called opposition reflex. That means if you pull back, they pull forward harder.
It’s not defiance—it’s science.
This reflex can trigger reactive behavior, especially if your dog already feels unsure. Instead, use a loose leash and teach a “Look at me” cue or simple redirection to break the stare-down before it turns into a scene.

Final Thoughts: You love your dog. That’s never in question. But sometimes, love looks like structure. It looks like advocacy. And it looks like learning what makes your dog feel safe and what accidentally pushes them over the edge.
If your dog is showing reactivity—or you’re raising a young pup you don’t want to go down that path—this is your invitation to lead with knowledge, confidence, and calm energy.
Want more help with reactivity and building a therapy-quality temperament? Reach out—we’re here to guide you every step of the way. 🐾

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